


Just Sit There, You Dumbass of an Old Prune

by fusrohdah



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged up characters, Character Death, M/M, Retirement Home
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-06-01 07:17:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6508174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fusrohdah/pseuds/fusrohdah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being 76 wasn't fun. Tsukishima's back hurt a lot more than he would like to admit, and most days he couldn't even get up from his wheelchair because his knees couldn't support his weight anymore. He was old, he was tired, and by the gods was he grumpy. </p><p>or the one where Tsukishima is in a retirement home and he loves to annoy the nurses taking care of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Sit There, You Dumbass of an Old Prune

**Author's Note:**

> Hi ! :) I hope you'll enjoy this, please do tell me what I need to work on to write better. I hope this is in character, and yeah that it's enjoyable.
> 
> I just love old people so much.

Being 76 wasn't fun. Tsukishima's back hurt a lot more than he would like to admit, and most days he couldn't even get up from his wheelchair because his knees couldn't support his weight anymore. He was old, he was tired, and by the gods was he grumpy. 

He knew most of the staff in the retirement home he had been placed in didn't like him, appart from Mr.Tanaka who seemed to have a strange soft spot for him. It's true that he liked riling the nurses up by calling them five times a night just to go to the toilets, but he wouldn't act like that if he wasn't so bored. He hadn't even been allowed to bring his old dinosaur encyclopedia, which he had sworn to make them regret everyday. 

Really, he thought, he wasn't that bad of an old man. If only the nurses didn't insist on him laying in bed all day he would be a bit nicer. Just a little bit though.

It was the first time he called the nurses this night. It was a friday, and he knew the nurse would be Mr. Kageyama. A strange young man who clearly didn't respect his elders. That would teach him, he thought bitterly. 

The door of his room opens with a creak, and Tsukishima hears a long sigh. He smiles to himself, youth these days was everything but energetic it seemed. 

“ Mr.Tsukishima. What a surprise. What can I do for you ? ” Mr.Kageyama asks, looking exasperated already.

Tsukishima coughs a bit before straightening himself up as much as he can in the elevated bed he had been given. The kind of beds made for old people, he hated those god forsaken beds. He wasn't that old yet.

“ Ah hello, I forgot your name. Bring me a tall glass of water. ” He demands in a flat tone, happily noticing the twitching eyebrow of Mr.Kageyama. He was just too easy to anger.

“ Are you really sure you need that Mr.Tsukishima ? You might want to lay off the water for a bit, you know you get a bit... Incontinent at night. ” The young man answers.

Incontinent ? Right. He would show him what incontinent was then. Clearly Mr.Kageyama didn't understand what the word meant, and Tsukishima would kindly show him.

“ Bring two. ” He tells him with a bright fake smile.

The younger man rolls his eyes but goes to get him his two glasses of water. Tsukishima drinks them as soon as he gets them. Now he would just have to wait, knowing himself this wouldn't take long. God, he loved friday nights. Messing with that Kageyama man was the highlight of his week, which if he had to admit it was kind of sad, but still. Really funny. He would have to make sure they kept him.

Thirty minutes have passed when he finally feels it. He has to go to the bathroom. Smiling in a demonic way he calls for the nurse again. A few uncomfortable minutes pass before Mr.Kageyama enters the room again.

“ Mr.Tsukishima. What can I once again do for you ? ”

“ Need to go to the bathroom. ” He grunts back. 

Mr.Kageyama sighs loudly but complies and helps Tsukishima out of bed, shaky on his legs the old man leans heavily on the nurse. It's at this moment the youngest knows he's fucked up. He feels hot liquid running down on his nurse uniform and sees a puddle forming under Tsukishima.

The old man smiles. “ Oops. Pissed myself. I guess I'm just too incontinent.” He says cheerfuly.

“ Oh my god. ” Mr.Kageyama whispers, and he lightly pushes Tsukishima so that he sits on the chair placed next to his bed. “ Just... Just fucking sit there you dumbass of an old prune. ”

“ I could report you for insulting me you know. ”

The young man was still staring at the mess the oldest had made. “ Yes well I could report you for harassing me but you don't see me doing that, do you ? ” He replies with sarcasm. “ How the hell am I supposed to work like this ? ” He mumbles to himself, looking at the state of his clothes.

“ I would advise a big smile and some deodorant. ” Tsukishima answers helpfully.

Mr.Kageyama gives him a baleful look before taking the room's mop from the closet it was stored in. He cleans up the puddle of pee near the bed and goes to wash his hands, before lifting Tsukishima from his seat.

“ Oi, where are you taking me ? ” The old man grunts. 

“ Bathroom, where else ? Hope you like being naked. ”

Ah. Tsukishima definitely hadn't thought about that. Usually it was Mr.Tanaka who washed him in the morning, and when it wasn't him it was that new nurse with blond hair. Ms.Yachi. He liked them well enough, he had his routine and they never looked at him as if he was a disgusting old man who couldn't take care of himself. 

He feels as if it's going to be quite the different experience with Mr.Kageyama.

He leans away from the nurse. “ Ah, you know I feel quite clean actually. Might as well just put me back into bed. Would be easier on you as well. Youth these days, you're all so lazy. ”

“ Your pants are literally dripping with pee. I seriously doubt you're feeling as clean you say. And I'm not putting you back in bed like that, it's disgusting. Now cooperate. ”

Tsukishima sighs, but does what he's told. He figures he has messed with the young nurse enough, and honestly he doesn't want security called on him. That had happened once and it surely wouldn't happen again.

“ Ok, I'm gonna fill the tub, sit on the toilets for now. What soap do you prefer ? ”

“ Is there anything else other than lavender or peppermint ? ” He drawls.

Mr.Kageyama shakes his head. “ No. Just those two, you know that. ”

The old man sighs again. “ Well lavender then. Let's change it up. Yay. ” 

The water is slowly rising in the tub, and an uncomfortable silence has taken place in the bathroom. Mr.Kageyama looks just about ready to go back home and if Tsukishima was being honest with himself he really wanted to go to bed.

“ You know you're acting like a child. ” The nurse says, breaking the quietness of the room.

“ I don't see what you're talking about. ”

The youngest glares at him. “ See ! You're so irritating ! No wonder no one likes you in this place ! I was even warned before taking the post they offered here, that's how much you piss people off.”

“ Mr.Tanaka and Ms.Yachi like me, they're civilised young people. ” He replies, before having a coughing fit.

Mr.Kageyama lets him calm down before talking again. “ Yes, well I'm not sure they like you as much as you think they do. It's their job to be nice to old people, especially the horrible ones. ” 

The oldest frowns. “ They like me. They do ! Now wash me you lazy asshole. ” He orders.

The young man rolls his eyes, but starts taking off Tsukishima's clothes nonetheless. He guides him gently in the bath, taking care of not looking at his crotch. Which, even if he doesn't mention it, the old man appreciates. He sits at the bottom of the tub and covers himself as much as he can. Silently Mr.Kageyama begins washing his back. The smell of lavender engulfs the room, Tsukishima remembers why he never asks for that specific soap, he hates the smell.

“ What's that big scar ? ” The nurse asks suddenly, touching a spot on his back that Tsukishima knows well.

The old man smiles. “ Fought with a ninja back in the days, your generation can't possibly know how hard t'was to get rid of them. ”

“ Stop lying. Ninjas didn't exist anymore when you were young. ”

Tsukishima nods grimly. “ Ah, true. ”

Mr.Kageyama was washing his chest now. “ So what is it ? ”

“ Got stabbed, t'was a long time ago though. ”

The nurse scoffs. “ You ? You were stabbed ? ” He was scrubbing hard at the old man's stomach.

“ Yes, well, couldn't really help it. I didn't exactly ask for it. ” He grunts. 

“ Now that I think about it it's not that surprising, I would stab you. ”

“ I can still report you. ”

The youngest smirks. “ You know you won't. ”

He finishes washing the old man in silence, and helps him out of the bath before bringing him clean clothes and dressing him.Once again he lifts the old man and walks him to his bed. Tsukishima sits at his usual place on the mastress as he watches the nurse sorting out the covers.

“ So, why were you stabbed ? ” He asks casually.  
Tsukishima turns his head away from him. “ Do people need a reason ? ”

“ I suppose not, but usually there is, even if it's a stupid one. ”

The old man nods in approval. “ Ah well, it's always been a stupid one to me. But at the time t'was not that stupid I guess. ”

“ Stop being cryptic when I'm trying to be nice. ” 

“ T'was the summer of 1980. I was 40 at the time. ” He begins.

“ Alright, but I'm not asking for your life story. ” He finishes smoothing the bed but sits down on the chair Tsukishima occupied earlier.

The oldest nods but still doesn't turn his head towards the nurse. “ Yeah, yeah I know how you youngsters are. Never wanna hear an old man speak. ”

Mr.Kageyama sighs. “ Don't play the victim, speak now if you want to. ” 

Tsukishima once again nods, before folding his hands in his laps. “ Yeah well anyway, t'was me and Yamaguchi, we were walking back home. I don't know I guess we weren't being careful enough like we should have, but t'was a beautiful night and we were kind of drunk so we were holding hands -”

“ Wait what ? ” Mr.Kageyama interrupts.

The old man whips his head towards the nurse and glares at him. “ Me. Yamaguchi. Holding hands. Got a problem young man ? ”

“ Me ? No, no problem. I just never thought someone would tolerate you in their personal space that's all. ”

Tsukishima turns his head back to the opposite direction and ignores him. “ So we were holding hands. And that man comes up to us and he was all nice and polite, was asking for directions too and Yamaguchi's such a nice guy he told him to follow us 'cause we were going in the same direction. So yeah. The guy followed us, and we were still holding hands.” The old man stops for few seconds to swallow his saliva. “ But suddenly there were three guys and we were too drunk to understand, but they pulled us in some kind of alleyway, I forgot the name by the way, but yeah we were in the alleyway and the three guys were calling us names. ” Tsukishima stops again.

He can see the reflect of Mr.Kageyama in the window, he is still on the chair, listening intently to the story, so Tsukishima starts again.

“ Like faggot, and stuff, you know the drill I guess. And at this point we were kind of scared I think 'cause t'was nightime and we were gays anyway so t'was not likely anyone would help us. They called us some more names, and pushed us face to the ground. Next thing I remember is waking up in the district's hospital. ” He finishes his explanation, playing with his fingers. He hopes Mr.Kageyama doesn't notice.

“ Wow, that's a cool survivor story. ” The nurse says honestly. “ What happened to that Yamaguchi ? Did you end up marrying each other last year when gay marriage was legalised ? ” He jokes, laughing a bit.

“ Ah, no. He kind of died that night so. ” Tsukishima answers still not looking at the nurse. The old man thinks it was funnier earlier when he was peeing on him.

Mr.Kageyama's laugh dies on his lips. “ Oh my god. I'm sorry, that was really innapropriate.”

Tsukishima observes him. “ I peed on you earlier, consider that payback.”

“ I'm pretty sure me making a joke about a dead guy is worse than you peeing on me. ” 

“ We're not gonna debate on it all night. ” Is all the oldest replies. 

The young man clears his throat lightly, Tsukishima suspects he feels awkward now. Making people feel awkward has always been his forte.

“ Is that why you never get visits ? ” Mr.Kageyama asks.

“ How do you know that ? It's supposed to be private. ”

“ Well everyone's always making fun of it, at least the nurses from my shift do. I mean I'm part of it too. You're really annoying you know, so people get petty. ”

Tsukishima nods. “ Nice to know. Well I had an older brother, but he died years ago. He was part of the army and never got a family of his own. ”

“ But did you never meet someone else ? ”

The old man glares at Mr.Kageyama again. “ No, Yamaguchi was very special. He and I had been friends since childhood, and I guess I am irritating so it kind of kept people away. Which I'm thankful about, I don't like people. ”

Mr.Kageyama gets up from the chair and smoothes out his dirty pants. “ Well, if you want to know what I think - ”

“ I can assure you I don't. ”

“ I think you're a lonely old man who likes to rile people up to make his pathetic life a little more fun. ”

“ Now that was just rude. ”

The young man nods. “ It is, but you deserve it. You peed on me. ” He replies, before turning around to leave the room.

“ Hey, I thought your joke was worse than me peeing on you. ”

“ And I thought we weren't supposed to debate on it ? Now, goodnight. I've got work to do. ”

~~~~~~~~

Tsukishima sleeps fairly well that night, but wakes up because of the sun. He's sure the nurses hadn't closed his shutters correctly just so that he would wake up earlier than everyone else. Mr.Kageyama had been right, people get petty. Who doesn't let an old man sleep ? 

Tsukishima sighs, he doesn't even know how long he has to wait until breakfast because the nurses decided it was best for him not to have a clock in his room ( really it was best for the nurses who knew he had a knack for waking them up at 4am when they were supposed to be working ).

So he waits for a bit and watches as the sun gets progressively brighter behind the shutters. He wished he still had the strength to go outside, but he knows he could get sick too easily especially since it's winter. He also wished he could still play volleyball, like he used to, but he knew he deluded himself he thought his old bones would keep up with that much sport.

Mr.Tanaka ends up knocking at his door one hour later and Tsukishima greets him with a growling stomach. 

“ Already up Mr.Tsukishima ? ” The bald young man asks. 

“ Yes, the sun was getting in my eyes. Did you bring the newspaper ? ”

“ Ah yes ! I read it, and you know what I learned ? Apparently last night an old man peed on a nurse from this retirement home. Wonder who that could be... ”

Tsukishima smiles, all gums and no teeth. “ C'mon. You gotta admit t'was good. ”

The nurse chuckles. “ Yes. I'm just disappointed I wasn't here to witness it. ” He answers. “ Don't do that to me though. ”

“ Depends. Did you bring me shortcake ? ”

“ Yes, but I'm afraid I won't be able to keep doing that. Sneaking food in patient's rooms is not quite legal you know. ”

“ Who cares, I'm getting my shortcake that's what's important. ” Tsukishima replies. “ Any interesting death today ? ”

“ Nope, Mr.Ennoshita went missing from the retirement home down the road though, so you might see him in the newspaper soon enough. ”

“ Ah, good. Couldn't stand that goody-two-shoes. His time has been up for a while too. ”

Mr.Tanaka smiled as he gives him a spoonful of shortcake. “ You're kind of fucked up you know. ”

Tsukishima bows lightly. “ Thanks. ” He responds while eating, naturally making a mess on his shirt.

“ Oh man, you gotta stop doing that ! ”

The old man gives him a big gummy smile once again, he has cake everywhere but in his mouth.

~~~~~~~~~~

It took two months of messing with Mr.Kageyama some more for Tsukishima to realise he actually kind of liked the nurse. Not that he would tell him. Never in his life. 

Tonight though Tsukishima really doesn't feel well, and he hesitates. He should just tell Mr.Kageyama, but maybe the nurse won't believe him. He weighs the pros and cons and finally decides to call for the nurse. Mr.Kageyama arrives in the room, looking ready to scream. Tsukishima notices he probably didn't have a good day. His face is all closed off and he seems on edge. 

“ Mr.Tsukishima. ” He bows, probably half-heartedly. “ What is it this time ? ” He asks curtly.

“ Actually I've been having pains in my left arm for an hour. Do you know what that could be ? ”

“ I'm a nurse not a doctor. It's probably just asleep though, if it still hurts in thirty minutes I'll get you painkillers. ” He says before getting out of the room.

Nice, Tsukishima thinks. That went nicely. Thirty minutes pass quickly, but his arm still hurts, and now his back does too. He calls for the nurse again. After all Mr.Kageyama had told him it was ok. The young man comes rapidly, looking as distressed as earlier. 

“ What now ? ”

“ I'm an elder, respect me some more would you ? ” Tsukishima says. “ My arm still hurts, and now my back does too. ”

“ Well aren't you getting old ? ” The young man replies with irony. “ I'm afraid I can't get you any painkillers though. I checked and there are no more left, but we'll definitely go get some tomorrow. You should just rest for now. ”

“ Rest ? But my arm hurts. ” He whines.

Mr.Kageyama shrugs. “ Well, beats me. ” He gets out of the room again, and Tsukishima sighs.

He really doesn't have a choice, so he decides to take a small nap. When he wakes up it's very dark outside, so much so he can't even see anymore through his shutters. His arm still hurts, so does his back, but now his jaw and chest hurt as well. He feels weak, panicky and is sweaty. He calls for the nurse again, this time he knows it's not a good sign. 

He hears Mr.Kageyama open the door of his room. “ Ah. Mr.Kageyama, I think I'm having a bit of a problem there. ” He gasps.

“ What is it ? ” The young man asks, not looking too worried and checking for his temperature.

“ I'm uh- ” God, what is it with him tonight ? He feels out of breath. “ The pain's still here, but now my jaw and chest hurt a lot as well. And uh, I'm feeling quite weak and sweaty. ” He feels panic bubbling up in his stomach but he doesn't say that. 

Mr.Kageyama looks down from Tsukishima's forehead where he was taking his temperature. “ Are you tricking me ? ” He asks.

“ No ? I'm just wondering what's happening. I'd really like painkillers if that's ok. ”

The young man's face suddenly turns sour and worried. He takes Tsukishima's hand in his own, and gets his urgency beeper out of his pocket and presses a few buttons before putting it back. That definitely isn't normal, Tsukishima thinks.

“ Ok, you're going to listen to me. What you're feeling right now is called infarctus, or heart attack. It's going to be ok though, we're taking you to the hospital. Hold on tight. ” He says, still holding Tsukishima's hand.

“ Are you trained to say that ? ” He jokes a bit, but the pressure on his chest really hurts and he's not sure he can laugh.

“ Kind of. I just don't want you to panic. ”

Tsukishima nods a bit dumbly he thinks. “ Am I going to die ? ” 

“ No you're not. ”

“ Are you also trained to say that ? ”

“ Yes, but it's true. You're not gonna die. As if I'm going to let the most annoying old man I've ever met die. ” He says.

“ You wanted to stab me though. ” He replies.

Tsukishima doesn't hear Mr.Kageyama's reply because all the other nurses come in his room and put him on a stretcher. Soon enough and without realising he was being moved he's in an ambulance. He knows Mr.Kageyama is in here with him because he can still feel the man's hand in his own. That's the most he's ever been volontarily touched since a really long time, he thinks stupidly. He's probably thinking that because he's going to die. Trust his brain to be a bitch until the end. 

“ Hey Mr.Kageyama. ” He says, tries for his voice to stay flat but all he can get out is a gasp.

“ Yes ? ”

“ Well I have this picture back in the retirement home. It's in my bedside table. If I die, I'd like to burnt with it if that's ok ? ” He asks. 

“ Ok, but you're not going to die, so don't worry about it. ” The nurse says.

“ Yes, yes. But if... Please remember it. It's really important to me. ” Mr.Kageyama tightens his hold on his hand and nods.

Tsukishima dies in the ambulance before reaching the hospital.

~~~~~~~~

Kageyama enters Tsukishima's room slowly. It feels weird without the old man's presence. He knew the risks of getting attached when he had taken this job, he knew it would be hard when losing a patient. Still, he had cried so much in the ambulance, and back at home, and in the car this morning when coming back here.

He had promised Tsukishima though, and that's why he is back in his room. He goes directly to the bedside table, as instructed by the old man, and opens the drawer. Inside are laying papers, unimportant ones mostly, and old newspapers. He empties the piece of furniture, and at the bottom finds what he has been searching for. 

It's an old polaroid picture, on it are pictured two mens, they look about 30. One of them had brown hair, freckles and had big smile adorning his face. The other was taller, had blond hair, glasses and looked grumpy, eventhough he looked at the other man with soft eyes. 

Could that be ? Kageyama turned the picture, searching for a note, a found one at the bottom right corner. “ Tadashi and I, May 9th 1970, first couple picture ”.

He gasps and takes his phone out of his pocket before taking a picture of the polaroid. He knows the old man would probably not be too happy about it, but he needs to remember. 

He sits on the chair next to Tsukishima's bed. He can't believe this happened. Somehow he had just thought the old man would be here forever, to annoy him or to tell him stories. It just didn't occur to him that he could die too. His eyes fix the spot he had cleaned a few months ago when Tsukishima decided to show him what incontinent really meant.

He puts his head in hands and cries, it's stupid he knows. Crying about pee, Tsukishima would laugh at him. But really, he isn't just crying about pee. He cries for the old man's not so toothy grins, or for the shortcakes he knew he could have brought him. For the family he didn't have. For the nice words he could have given from time to time instead of saying mean things. Like that night.

The door of the room opens and he sees Tanaka enter. His eyes are red and he greets Kageyama with a nod. 

“ Crying in his room, really ? ” He says.

Kageyama opens his mouth to apologize but closes it before opening it again. “ Yes, sorry. I just. I was thinking about that time he peed on me. ”

“ You called him incontinent though, he doesn't- didn't like that. ” Tanaka says, and he takes a seat on the bed. 

“ He told you about that ? ”

“ No, I learned it from other nurses. He just confirmed it to me. ”

Kageyama nods. “ I'm going to miss him. ” He says simply.

“ Yeah me too buddy, me too. ” Tanaka replies.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't kill me ?? Please ?
> 
> This took a darker path than I thought it would, but it's a reality: old people die, most of them alone. And the message in this fic is kind of to realise it's important to take care of your elders. Because they get lonely easily, and you don't know when is the last time you're going to see them.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this, and if you found any mistake please tell me. I'm not a native speaker so I'm probably not aware if I made them and I'd like to correct them. :)


End file.
